If you “travel” in the right circles, you hear a lot now about subjective reality, seeing different movies, creating your own experience, and “The Algorithm.” Elon Musk went on Joe Rogan and told the world that there was a strong probability that this is all just an elaborate simulation. If that is the case, coincidences, ghosts, déjà vu, and random, strange events are all in the program or are hiccups. It sort of makes sense, right?
Happy New Year, fam! Do you like my theme for the year? It’s not as good as the original, “Cuttin’ a Bitch in 2006,” but it’ll do.
A few months ago, the tech giants came for Alex Jones. Twitter, Facebook, and YouTube simultaneously decided that he was peddling hate speech and that it was time for him to go. Twitter sort of danced a bit. First he was gone and then he was back, but in the end, Jones’s account had to die. He was the first casualty in what seems to have morphed into a mass banning effort that has started further to the outskirts of the right and is creeping ever more steadily towards the center.
As I stepped outside the door into the garage this morning and put the door up, the shock of cold air on my face and the dim winter light felt almost like a time warp of sorts. It happens every year, but it felt especially strong today as I started the car and backed out of the driveway, the car’s metal creaking in the chill. It was a brittle cold, a Fargo sort of cold.
Well, I don’t know about you all, but I’m full of pie. And just food. Do you know what’s better than turkey and mashed potatoes topped with my own cranberry chutney and mopped up with my pumpkin challah bread? Fucking nothing except the very same thing topped with Debbie G’s Oreo pudding fluff crack and banana cream pie. That’s the state of my stomach tonight, kids. I’m full.